I got a manicure today and as soon as I got home, I ruined some of it (as you can see by the thumb). The nail polish wasn’t mine so I can’t fix it. But what I can do is learn three things from my manicure:
1. People aren’t perfect. The lady cutting my cuticles left a glaring one hanging that I cut myself when I got home. But I can’t expect her to be perfect and see every detail, just as I can’t expect myself to be perfect and catch every detail.
2. Life is messy. My nails aren’t quite what I would like them to be. Just like life. You think you’ve got things all figured out and suddenly life puts a huge dent in your flawless manicure. Life won’t turn out how you expect it to.
3. All things will pass. My manicure won’t last forever and crappy things don’t last forever. In a week, I will not care about the smudge on my thumb because it will not be there. Most troubles will come and go; what will remain are the lessons we’ve learned.
A bonus: most things are fine. Most of my nails look great. Those are the ones I can show off. Most things in life tend to be fine. It’s just the glaring, obvious problems that tend to get our attention. But when you consider everything that’s going on in your life, most things are going well (especially if you have the ability to read this).
Can you name one thing going well in your life in spite of feeling like things are going wrong?
Building traffic and revving up my SEO marketing sounds nice in theory, but I don’t have time for it. While I love writing, I am daunted by a blog’s need for content. It is always hungry, never satiated, always wanting more.
I don’t blog every day because, frankly, I have nothing of value to add each day. I don’t want this blog to become “I had a good day today because my family was here!” or “I had a horrible day today. Worst day EVAR!!!” I want this blog to be somewhat smart and interesting. I want to tackle topics that are important to me that other people don’t talk about. (Well, I could talk about poop but moms of newborns have that covered.) Okay, maybe I’ll tackle politics this year.
I have several blogs, each focused on a different topic: Pop! Goes the Music focuses on pop music but I’ll probably only post to that when I feel like it rather than trying to establish a regular posting schedule. I’ve been upfront on depression introspection that the site is rarely updated and mainly offered as a resource. I also have a professional blog about the dynamics of the American English language.
Posting to This Journey Is My Own is still fun. I don’t do it often, much of my posts are scheduled (thanks to prompts), and I blog when I want to rather than feeling like I need to (as with my professional blog). I also like that my readership is moderate despite that wacky 992 e-mail subscriber number. Read more…
Continuing to write about my opinion on recent political events, I turn my attention on international matters to a more domestic affair: the overturning of Proposition 8, California’s voter-approved ban on same-sex marriage. I have long held the view that:
- Religious institutions have no right to impose their views into secular institutions while claiming separation of church and state, and
- A majority group should not determine the lives of a minority group if it has no direct effect on the majority’s daily lives
I do know that it’s an uphill battle to keep the ruling overturned and that supporters of Prop 8 will do their damndest to “protect the institution of marriage” for as long as they possibly can.
Quite frankly, however, Prop 8, federal amendments banning same-sex marriage, and the prevention of even civil unions is bigotry, pure and simple. Members of the LGBT community are seen as inferior to heterosexuals and therefore, are made to suffer by not even granting them the simple right to legally marry.
All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the State wherein they reside. No State shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any State deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws.
Prop 8 and other same-sex marriage bans across the country (or conversely, the denial of allowing gays to legally marry) is in direct contradiction to this clause. Some might argue that this clause applies only to black people and is framed by the historicity of the post-Civil War era. However, this is the only explicit mention of equality granted for ALL citizens (born or naturalized) in the United States.
Judges who rule in favor of same-sex marriage aren’t necessarily playing favorites despite rumblings that Judge Vaughn Walker, who recently overturned Prop 8, is gay; it’s a matter of striking down any law that cuts a citizen off from a privilege of the United States—the privilege of being able to legally marry in a court of law—and forbidding the deprivation of the liberty to marry and receive all the benefits that come with marriage, in accordance with the second sentence of the Equal Protection Clause. Any judge who upholds bans on same-sex marriage is not acting in accordance with this clause and is, in fact, betraying his or her own bias in the ruling. No one is guaranteed the right to marry in the United States but all citizens are guaranteed the ability to enjoy the same privileges as one another. Denying that legal ability to any group is inequality, and under the U.S. Constitution as amended, an injustice.
So when I hear of organizations like the National Organization for Marriage that fight so desperately to maintain marriage between one woman and one man in a secular country (despite talk that it was founded on Christian principles—whatever—the U.S is not a theocracy), my blood begins to boil. If the sole purpose of organizations like this was to prevent religious institutions from having to perform gay marriages in an effort to maintain separation of church and state, then fine. But if the point is to lay some kind of hold on marriage in the secular realm as well then it’s promoting inequality—something I refuse to stand for as an American citizen and as a Christian.
Those are the things running through my head lately.
What’s pointless? Life.
Who’s worthless and useless? I am.
I’m very aware of my humanity and frailty. I’m aware that my beating heart could stop. At any time.
I’m conscious that my last breath could be. Any moment.
I am enduring a mild depression. Without medication. And it’s scary.
I have given up on suicide. I’ve failed at my multiple attempts. I obviously won’t succeed anytime soon.
I’m enduring a crisis of faith. I still believe in God but wonder about Christianity. Read more…
So the name of this blog is “This Journey Is My Own” based off of a song by Sara Groves of the same name. Its accompanying sub is “Attempting to live and breathe for an audience of one.” I’m amused by the tagline since this a public blog. In the end, however, what I do and chronicle on here is ultimately for God so no holds barred anymore.
I have another blog, Depression Introspection, currently hosted at Typepad but am working on moving it to WordPress. You can find what I’ve got so far here: http://depressionintrospection.wordpress.com.
Depression Introspection was begun as a blog to focus solely on various aspects of mental illness: depression, bipolar disorder, suicide, schizophrenia, psychotropic medications, among other topics. Now I feel like I’ve outgrown the site. Continuing to post there would put me in a psychological box. Depression Introspection was created specifically for address mental health issues and I don’t want that to be the sole focus of my blogging.
I’m also at a point where I need a place to rant and vent about life in a teenage-like style. I avoided that for the most part on the blog, which was also informally titled deepintro. I intend to rant and rave as much as I like here.
I started out under the pseudonym of Marissa. Now I’m posting under my nickname Kass because I’m tired of trying to hide who I am. It gets tiresome. It gets old. I used to blog about my job. For the sake of employment, that’s probably the one topic that will remain off this blog.
I selected “This Journey Is My Own” as the name of my blog because I think the song expresses so much of what I struggle with. Groves sings poignantly of the issues of people-pleasing, one of the greatest sins in my life. You can read the lyrics to the song here and listen to the song here.
I hope to blog on a variety of topics including mental health. We’ll see what happens.